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♫ Fresh Prince of Rawalpindi {comic 94}

♫ Now, this baqwaas story is all about how:
My dunya got flip-turned, upside down, and
I'd like to take a minute, tum wahan baiteh raho
I tell you about how I got a rishta from the state, Chicago.

In east Rawalpindi town, born and raised,
With a veranda is how I spent most of my days.
Chillin' out, smokin' and playing pitu,
And shooting up fireworks outside of the school.

When a couple of ulloos, bathameez and no good,
Started makin' fitna in my neighbourhood!

We got in one kabaddi fight, (it was a kharaab party)
My abbi yelled "beta, it's time for shadi!"

I begged and pleaded "abbi! NAHI!" day after day,
But he packed my salwar kameez and sent me to the US of A.

Ummi give me a thaphar, kiss, then she gave me my ticket,
She said, "you're getting a beevee, you may as well kick it".

First class on PIA, yo' this is so bad:
Drinkin' qahwah and chai out of a champagne glass.

Is this what the people of Chicago live like?
Ji haan - then shadi just might be all right.

But wait, I thought American larkian were nakhre-wali ras malai,
Is Chicago the type of place they should send this top bhai?

Oh yaar, I prayed hard, goin' to the city that's windy.
I hope they're prepared for the Prince of Pindi.

Well, uh the plane landed and when I got there,
There was a bearded dude, who asked me Who? Kiun? and Where?

"I ain't tryin' to get married saab, I just got here!
Ya Allah save me!" ...Then a hot bint appeared.

I whistled at her looks, but when she came near,
She looked like my cousin, hai, just what I feared!

Nothing I could say saved me from the nikkah,
I tried to run away but they caught me by car...

I've been shadi shuda for years, about 7 or 8,
And I yell to my beevee, "yo, why's the dinner late?"

I looked at my kingdom, I was finally there:
A taxi driver, husband, the Prince of welfare. ♫

Italic Urdu & Arabic words translated:

dunya = life, world
tum wahan baiteh raho = you stay sitting where you are
rishta = relationship (marriage proposal)
pitu = dirt game, like dodgeball
ulloo = fool
bathameez = disrespectful
kabaddi = ethnic wrestling
kharaab = spoilt, bad

abbi = my father
ummi = my mother
beta = son
thaphar = slap
beevee (biwi) = wife
qahwah = black coffee
chai = tea
shadi = wedding, marriage
larkian = girls (sing. larki: girl)
nakhre-wali = fussy (girls)
ras malai = ras malai (innuendo)
bhai = brother
kiun? = why?
saab = sir

bint = girl
hai = 'oh', expression
nikkah = islamic marriage contract
shadi shuda = married, past tense

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  1. HAHAHAHA!!! You cant help but 'sing it out loud' in your head!! Man, you should sing thing is on youtube!! I'll help! :D

  2. salam sis.

    hahhahah i couldnt stop enjoying reading this funny post.

  3. extremely stereotypical. perhaps you can do one post on those britain based confused desi females who cant stop oogling over males just because their biological clock is ticking and they haven't found a spouse yet.

  4. I flagged this comment. :/

  5. **Halal police**. Sr. Saeeda has a point. Women aren't chastised as much as men for the same ogling and googling towards the opposite gender.

  6. "started makin' fitna in my neighborhood" LOL nice one. i didnt read the whole thing tho

  7. @Muslim_sk8r - do come back to read The Fresh Prince Of Rawalpindi. {http://t.co/MFtgkAD} #pakistani #cool #comics

  8. you didnt translate bint

    love the word play :)

  9. erm... i dunno if my comment got submitted.

    just said, excellent word play

    and you didnt translate bint.

  10. Bint: Arabic for girl, and slang for girl.


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